


Whatever You Need (Well, Not Anything)

by strutforlove



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: A scene after the film and before the mid-credits scene, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bucky Barnes Feels, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Mid-Credits Scene, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Fix-It, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Pre-Slash, Screw you Markus and McFeely, Steve Rogers Feels, This can be interpreted as pre-slash or friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-05-09
Packaged: 2018-06-07 11:02:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6801079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strutforlove/pseuds/strutforlove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Bucky seems the most unsure he's looked so far, fidgety but fixated, and dread fills Steve's stomach. He knows that expression. "I just thought— Maybe I should just be put under again, at least until the triggers could be... Until I'm safe to be around."</em>
</p>
<p> <em>Everything stops.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>How I imagine the conversation between T’Challa, Bucky and Steve going as they decide how to handle Bucky’s situation.<br/>Spoiler alert: not by putting him in cryo, that’s for sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Whatever You Need (Well, Not Anything)

**Author's Note:**

> After seeing the mid-credits scene, I was pissed because my favorite character had just been fridged — there's giving someone agency and then there's just plain stupid, irresponsible writing. (If you were fine with it, cool, more power to you.) So here's my version on how it doesn't come to that.

Steve can’t settle down. The rush of adrenaline from fighting has worn off and he aches all over, but instead of tired he’s feeling restless.

He’s on T’Challa’s quinjet with the man himself and Bucky. They are on their way to Wakanda, where T'Challa has graciously offered them a safe haven before they figure out their next move.

Thanks to the serum, he and Bucky are both already healing, Bucky a bit slower, but having tended to his wounds and seen they’re not life-threatening, Steve isn’t as worried as before — Bucky’ll get there, too. After he and Bucky had patched up in mutual silence T’Challa had offered them some spare clothes, their uniforms currently in a heap on the floor, bloody and ruined.

Steve moves to the cockpit to fiddle with the controls of the quinjet, looking for a way to make it steer itself par T’Challa’s earlier suggestion he just remembered. Tony hasn’t hacked into their systems yet, which Steve attributes to either the man not being aware of T’Challa’s involvement or just choosing to give them a break, though he thinks the latter is quite unlikely.

_A-ha._ Steve finds the controls he’s looking for. The jet now on autopilot, he gets up and leans against the wall, mindful of the wounds in his abdomen, and faces Bucky.

Bucky is slouched in his seat, positioned so he’s minding his worst wounds as well. As Steve looks at Bucky the stump under his black shirt gives him pause, and he finds he has mixed feelings about it. On one hand – pun definitely not intended – it’s a reminder of what was done to him by Hydra, now partly undone because of Tony’s rage, but on the other Steve had also begun to get used to seeing it already, a part of this new Bucky. Steve doesn’t know how Bucky himself feels about it. He says the part where the arm was ripped off doesn’t hurt, but his sense of balance surely is off. After Steve had half-carried him to the jet, they’d sat him down and he hasn’t tried to get up since.

"So, that was a love fest," Bucky opens grimly.

Steve sighs. "You can say that again." He spares a thought on how they left things, how the Avengers are now truly and completely broken, what they’d built over time in pieces, half of his friends most likely imprisoned. It hurts, but just like there in the Soviet bunker, he finds he doesn’t regret fighting for what was right, and later just for Bucky. Same thing, really.

T'Challa appears from the back, phone on his hand. "I called my facility. They know that we are coming."

Steve’s instant reaction is to protest, but before he can so much as open his mouth T'Challa holds up a hand. "My people can be trusted. I guarantee that."

Steve's conflicted. He’s doubtful of putting his trust on a near-stranger, especially a man who only a day ago was hell-bent on clawing Bucky open and ripping him to shreds. But he knows a lot has changed, and they don't exactly have a ton of options here. He looks at Bucky, the small nod he gets saying enough. "Okay. We trust you,” he acquiesces, once again finding himself marveling at how familiar yet so strange it feels to meet Bucky's eyes for a silent opinion, how seamlessly they still communicate even with decades of ice and torture between them.

T’Challa doesn’t seem put off about Steve's doubt. "Good. The trip is going to be a few hours. Gives us enough time to come up with a plan." The look T'Challa throws in Bucky's direction is anything but unkind, but it makes his point very clear. A wanted super soldier with a trigger problem, right.

Steve shifts into strategy mode, running things over. "So, not only is the whole world on a lookout for me, they're still after you as well, Buck. Even though we can probably prove you were framed for the UN bombing and explain you were triggered to attack the people at the facility, it's unlikely that they'll listen to us. If they were willing to shoot on sight before, they sure as hell aren't letting off now. And even if they were, there are still the things the Winter Soldier did they would love to never let you see the light of day for, either behind bars or soft walls. Anyone could get to you there.”

T'Challa seems to agree. "Yes, there is no way of knowing-"

" _I,_ " Steve hears Bucky say. For a moment he thinks he’s just hearing things, but T’Challa’s clearly stopped talking so that can’t be it. They both turn to Bucky, whose gaze isn't on either of them but fixated on some invisible spot on the floor, his jaw clenched tight.

"What?" Steve finally asks, puzzled.

Bucky's voice is even quieter than before, but firm. He looks up at Steve, his gaze unwavering now. "I. I was, am, the Winter Soldier. I did those things. Yeah, Steve, I know I was made to do it, I wasn't ‘me’, in control, but _it_ was still me. So just— please don't refer to me like that."

Steve swallows down raw emotion. He only wishes to ease Bucky’s pain, to be there for him and help him heal. So why does he always just manage to make things worse? "Okay. I'm sorry," is all he has to offer.

Bucky seems to take it, nodding. His expression softens, which isn’t to say it was really angry before, but still. There is so much Steve hasn't gotten to talk about with him, so many things unsaid, but for now this seems enough. Bucky takes a moment to stare pensively ahead but soon continues, "But yeah, you're right. They are going to hunt me. Before this I would've just gone hiding again but..."

"The triggers," Steve finishes.

"Yeah. Like you said, if they catch me and by some miracle do take me alive there's no guarantee who I'll be facing again."

Steve is silently grateful Bucky isn't straight up arguing for being put to jail or a ward for the rest of his life. He doesn't care if it's because he probably wouldn't survive the arrest and it would all be for nothing or because he rightfully doesn't think what's happened is his fault, but Steve isn't going to look this gift horse in the mouth. They've got more urgent things to hash out. "Yeah. We can't know how many people knew the words or about them." Steve doesn’t really want to bring attention to this, but they kind of have to know, so he asks, "Do you remember them?"

Bucky's face takes yet another form of grim and haunted and Steve's heart aches. "Yes," Bucky answers, "The first ones more clearly because I was just starting to lose control. I hadn't— I don't remember everything from the past decades, maybe I never will, so I didn't remember what the words were at first, just that they weren't anything good. I— I tried to get out, stop him. I somehow knew... But yeah, I do remember them."

For a second Steve is hit with a mental image of Bucky inside that glass box, powerless to do anything as his programming is called online against his will, but he shuts down that train of thought quickly, afraid he might lose it otherwise. Instead he asks, "Do you think there is more than one combination? More triggers?"

Bucky shakes his head, helpless. "I don't know."

Steve just nods. He’s glad T’Challa had had the sense to confine Zemo to the other quinjet and knock him out before Steve and Bucky had emerged from the bunker. He doesn’t want to think what he might’ve done if the person who did this to Bucky had been awake to face him without an impenetrable wall to protect them. Nothing admirable, that he’s sure of.

Bucky takes a long breath, shifting in his seat. His words are for Steve, T'Challa keeping a small distance in the cockpit. "We need to come up with a solution. I hurt people, and your friends," he says, before adding, "again." He looks down, pain clear on his features, his voice small. "I hurt you again."

_God, he remembers._ Given Bucky’s disorientation when he’d woken up, Steve couldn’t be sure, but now he is. Steve needs to be closer to Bucky and also preferably sit down, so he does both, taking the seat next to him. "It's okay, Buck," he soothes. "It wasn't your fault. I don't think anyone with enough knowledge of what happened would blame you. I don't."

Bucky's smile is a shadow of the snark that used to light up his whole face so long ago, but it's there. It makes Steve smile even before the words can. "You wouldn't blame me for stealing a kid's candy bar, Steve. Would probably come up with a nice little theory to justify it, too. You've always been biased."

Steve lights up at the teasing and laughs. "True," he concedes, before sobering to say, "Doesn't mean I'm wrong."

Bucky thankfully doesn’t argue. They look at each other for a moment, and Bucky nods before shifting in his seat, almost curling in on himself. His gaze is on his lap as he says, "I just... I can't— I don't want to hurt anyone anymore."

Steve really wants to hug him, for Bucky's comfort or his own, he doesn't know and doesn't really care. Now's not the right time to instigate that for the first time, though. He doesn’t yet know if his touch would truly be welcome, and more than that he’s afraid if he’ll embrace Bucky he won’t be able to stop. Instead he says, "Of course you don't — we know. It's okay."

Bucky shakes his head in frustration, quite like all those times Steve had said something he deemed stupid in the past, his expression just a bit more muted. "No, it's not. I have a switch in my head that anyone with enough knowledge can activate. I can’t trust my own mind. I'm not safe to have around. Before this, for a while— It took me a lot of time to regain a sense of control as well as the memories I have, to not feel like I could revert back my programming any second. And to lose all that with those words..."

Steve is not crying, but there's certainly something stuck in his throat and behind his eyelids. With Bucky's words he's brought back to seeing him in Winter Soldier mode again, with no clue who Steve was, with those cold eyes he had last seen on the helicarrier and the street where they'd fought. This had been the Winter Soldier in his purest form, cold and brutal. Steve had hoped he would never see that again, that Bucky would never have to experience that again. He was wrong and if he feels like his heart is being torn apart he can't even begin to imagine what it must’ve been like for Bucky. "I'm so sorry, Buck," is all he can manage.

Bucky tempers down with sigh, his tone fond. "I'm not looking for a pity party, Rogers. I'm just saying I'm dangerous, still."

T'Challa chimes in then. Steve can't know what he must think of this bickering and soothing thing he and Bucky have got going on, but he doesn’t say anything so Steve doesn’t dwell on it. "I can't disagree with the Sergeant there. Not only that, but like discussed, people are going to be looking for him."

Steve tries to weave this all together. "So we've got to keep you away from both national and international police and intelligence organizations as well as the people who might know about the words and come after you. We're technically criminals now, and with what’s happened we’re not likely to get help from anyone, least of all Stark who arguably has the best means for it." Steve bristles at mentioning Tony's name but judging from his expression Bucky doesn't look too fazed. Before that can change, Steve pushes, "Any suggestions?"

T’Challa seems to be ready for that question. "I may have one. In the wilderness of Wakanda I have a hidden operating facility for myself and those who assist me. Medical, psych, tech, security – we’ve got all that covered." T'Challa pulls up a hologram picture of the place and Steve stands up to take a better look. It's big and looks very modern. Of course with Wakandans having Vibranium and being able to come up with the Black Panther suit they'd have to be very advanced. Still, Steve’s impressed. "It's not Stark but then again nothing is," T'Challa says, and Steve nods, definitely liking what he's seeing.

"You would help us? After everything?" He asks, a bit dubious.

T’Challa puts the picture away, turning to Bucky. "Yes. Mr. Barnes-"

"Bucky," comes the clarification and Steve can't help the surge of happiness and pride at Bucky once again stating that's what he wants to be called. Steve would've accepted any name the man would've chosen, of course, but the meaning of Bucky's choice is certainly not lost on him.

T'Challa nods. "Bucky, thank you — I would rather not talk about you in third person. Yes, I will do my utmost to ensure your safety and healing process. You have been through enough to make lesser men never come out the other side of it. Now that I know of your story, I must say I am in awe of your resilience."

Damn right. Steve smiles proudly. "I second that."

T'Challa grins. "I'm sure you do. So, it only feels right to offer you all the assistance I can. As far as I’m concerned, there shall be no ill feelings between us two any longer."

Bucky nods, clearly agreeing with T’Challa’s sentiment. He then looks away, seemingly deep in thought for a moment, before saying, "I appreciate it. But, as I recall, I blasted out of that UN facility like it was nothing."

"Because the power went off,” Steve says, “But yeah. How do you propose we'd keep Bucky safe?" The other half of the sentence remains unsaid on purpose.

T'Challa shrugs. "Stark once came up with a room enforced enough to contain the Hulk. I'm pretty sure we can come up with one that'll contain you comfortably if you so wish. Offer you the help you need, therapy, let our trained professionals work on those triggers with you from another side of the glass."

Steve crosses his arms. He can't help but be a bit wary. "Sounds a bit like prison."

"He would be free to go whenever he should choose to do so. I wish to help, not imprison."

T'Challa doesn't really seem cross at Steve, but he still rushes to apologize, "I know, sorry, it just-"

"Struck a nerve? I get that," T'Challa says with a grin.

Steve shakes out the ugly mess of worry, protectiveness and embarrassment balled up inside him and focuses on the discussion proper, finding Bucky’s gaze again. "What do you think of this, Buck? Think staying at his base is a good idea?"

"I think it's the best so far," Bucky concedes. He looks pensive though, and soon asks T’Challa, "Do you happen to have cryo technology there?"

What? The question rattles Steve, a complete shot in the dark. T'Challa seems puzzled, as well. "Yes, we do,” he answers warily. “We don’t have use for it often but it’s fully operational. Why do you ask?"

Now Bucky seems the most unsure he's looked so far, fidgety but fixated, and dread fills Steve's stomach. He knows that expression. "I just thought— Maybe I should just be put under again, at least until the triggers could be... Until I'm safe to be around."

Everything stops. Steve can't breathe, terror tearing through him so hard he’s reminded of the time when pneumonia was making his smaller body shake like a leaf, sickness all around him. This is worse. "What? Bucky, no!” he rushes, “That's not an answer. After all you've been through— only to go through that again—” He fights his mind to supply him with logic, “And- and it wouldn't be any safer. Someone could get in and— and use those triggers on you again anyway and you would be powerless to stop them, completely under their control. And you couldn't know when you'd be let—“ He can’t finish that thought, mental images making him turn to pleading, “Just, no, Bucky, _please_ —"

Steve barely registers T'Challa's arm on his shoulder, trying to ground him as he calmly interrupts, "His delivery is surely overcome with emotion, but I must agree with the Captain. Although on my part I can vouch for the safety of our facilities, I am also not a fool. I cannot know what the future holds. Furthermore, in my honest opinion, shutting your mind because of left over programming, however dangerous, is not the answer to anything. You may feel like it would be a convenient way to ensure everyone's safety and find peace from the turbulence of emotion and memories I can assume you've been experiencing, but simply locking your mind is not the solution."

By the time T'Challa stops talking Steve has collected himself enough to be able to add, "You’re not something to be put away – you’re worth so much more than that, Buck" through clenched teeth. He didn't think he could be more grateful to T'Challa than he already is for helping them, but for agreeing with him in this, he is.

Now that he's got a better hold of himself, Steve can look at Bucky properly again. Bucky doesn’t seem too affected by Steve’s rambling outburst, which Steve is relieved about. Instead, he seems to be contemplating, and Steve watches him with his heart still in his throat.

Finally Bucky sighs and nods, his acquiescence clear. Relief rushes through Steve and he takes a deep breath. He quietly but firmly says to everyone as well as himself, "Okay. So that's off the table."

T'Challa seems relieved as well. "Yes. Until we can come up with a way to erase the triggers or help you overcome them, I for one think it’s best you stay within my facilities. It may not be perfect, but it is the safest option right now."

Bucky's brows furrow. "Why do you keep saying overcome? I can't do that myself. You saw what the words did to me."

Steve turns to look at T'Challa, curious as well. "Not by yourself, no. I am not a trained professional, but I think with help and enough time it is possible. Exposure therapy is not painless, but if you are willing, until we can hopefully scan your brain to see whether there is a safe way to remove your left-over programming, I think it is our best option."

Steve mulls it over one more time. It's the best plan they've got. "What do you think, Buck?"

Bucky smiles, a bit grimly but Steve'll take what he can get at this point. "Well, I'm not exactly filled to the brim with hope, but I think you're right. I accept your offer. Thank you."

Steve tries not to let his relief show, but from the look on Bucky's face he's pretty sure he hasn't succeeded. Whatever. Bucky can deal with it for scaring him half to death. On some more rational level, Steve knows they’re going to have to talk about this, just like about a lot of things. He’s both dreading and looking forward to it. Right now he just breathes.

T'Challa nods, grabbing his phone again. "Okay. Let me make a call to the facility. I will tell them to start making preparations for our arrival."

"Thank you," Steve says as T'Challa makes his way to the back.

Steve looks at Bucky, his posture and the circles under his eyes communicating exhaustion both physical and mental. Yes, he and Bucky will talk about this, about what all that’s happened means for Bucky and for him. But for now, just this moment, he knows words are not what Bucky most needs. So Steve sits down next to him and says nothing, hoping it conveys enough — that he’s there for Bucky, always will be, in whatever way he needs. _To the end of the line._

**Author's Note:**

> I know nothing about T’Challa beyond the film. I’m sorry for any horrible mistakes I made with his characterization.
> 
> You can find me on [Tumblr](http://strutforlove.tumblr.com)


End file.
